friday.

five whole days since i left. i can barely remember sunday. sunday existed in some other universe, where some other girl lived. i am pretty sure sunday does not even exist in berlin.

today our teacher was sick. a man in light-wash jeans and a tweed jacket came into our classroom. he spoke, it seems, out of an enormous blonde mustache, in place of a mouth. the mustache said, heute ist deine lehrerin sehr krank. es tut mir leid. instead of class, the institute would take us on a free trip to the alte nationalgalerie. aber nicht bis 14.00 uhr, he said. 

everyone looked around nervously. we had 45 minutes until we left.  previously, we were only united by this one tiny woman, who speaks beautiful german, while we flounder to reply. but today she was krank. suddenly, we were naked. 

and then, carlos suggested maybe we all have coffee?

and so we had coffee. two french people, a chilean, a spaniard, an oklahoman, two canadians, a saudi arabian, and a cupcake had coffee and struggled to speak in german. it was perhaps my favorite moment yet in berlin. better yet, than impromptu riverside beers at club der visionäre with the lovely christian last night. and he even wore one of my bows. yes, this was still better. not because we said anything particularly meaningful, but because we struggled together, and that created our own connection outside the umbrella of our instructor's guidance. robert and i discussed our favorite german words. i told him mine is wortschatz, which means vocabulary, but the literal meaning is treasure of words. and his favorite is kopfkissen, which are pillows, but literally head kisses.  i was happy that someone else cared about the words themselves. 

i said, isn't it nice how learning another language teaches you things about your own? 

and he smiled and said, yes. 

and it was good.

i am going to be okay. i just have to keep telling myself that.

soon, my elizabeth is coming. and i will have my first weekend in berlin with someone here that loves me. i am elated.

maybe we will even find sunday.

schreiben sie mich bitte bitte bitte! (write me please!)

beth loster

goethe-institute

neue schönhauser str. 20
10178 berlin
germany

oder ruf mich an! (or call me!)

0176 35465048